I haven’t had the best of weeks, the truth be told. On top of my infection (we’ve been to hospital twice more this week…) I have a viral illness which is making me feel really poorly. It’s strange, and something I’ve never really read about before. It’s been suggested that I haven’t had a temperature throughout all of this because my body’s autonomic functions (I always remember these as the things your body does automatically e.g. blinking, digesting etc.) aren’t functioning correctly. It’s been very hard to define what has been the infection and what has been the viral illness. It’s hard to define what are my current everyday problems and flare ups, and what is something different because my body presents symptoms so weirdly.
I have to say that both Kendal and Lancaster acute services responded extremely well – especially given that I am “Complex Needs”, and tried their very best to do everything for me. The departments were all extremely busy and all the staff were dashing around. I didn’t see any take a break – and at tea time a nurse went around and asked everyone if they would like something to eat, or if anyone needs assistance eating. I know that this obviously isn’t applicable to me – but when you’ve been on a ward and seen a young lady unable to reach the food at the end of her bed, attempting desperately to reach it, and then it being thrown away, things like that are so very important. Taking the time out to help people with basics is an important part of the job – you never forget the staff that lend you the ward hairdryer, give you a bit of hand cream or go the extra mile for you.
Despite being discharged from hospital at 5pm on New Year’s Eve I got changed into a copper sparkly dress and went and sat in Paloma’s Cocktail bar in Kendal to see the new year in with two of my best friends. Both the food and cocktails looked incredible. I had talked with the Manager on Facebook beforehand, and explained that I couldn’t eat or drink and would just be sat there like a gooseberry – and they were wonderful. They tucked my wheelchair away and made me feel like a normal human being. I sat with the girls and we just sat chatting and laughing. It was great. I still felt rough, but I was desperate to go. It’s been something on my bucket list (no, I’m not dying, I just want to start living a bit more) for ages, and now I have officially seen the New Year in with my friends away from anyone’s home. I think I’m an adult! Haha.
I haven’t made any traditional New Years Resolutions because they have kind of been made for me! I can’t drink less alcohol (T-Total) or eat less cheese (Chee-total), but I have decided to try and do every single experience I possibly can, and to try and read at least a chapter of a book a day. I think they’re achievable.
I’m reading Girl Up and racing through it. It is an empowering book that talks about the issues women can face. It has covered sexist comments, “Girling up” as opposed to “manning up”, the dangers, pressure and fakery on social media, and sex. We are taught the biology of sex in schools, not how it translates to our lives. I would recommend this book to anyone aged 16+ full stop. Men should read it too, this is not a guide for girls it is a guide for everyone. In one chapter it asks you to go through some of the emails you have sent recently – how many times have you said “sorry”, “If you wouldn’t mind” and “I’m afraid”? Sometimes these things are appropriate, but I found that I’m very apologetic for often no real reason.